Pregnancy Quotes

Pregnancy can be the best of times and pregnancy can be the worst of times. After two baby boys, I can now look back with great satisfaction at the entire process of childbirth. But, if you are currently pregnant, I bet you cannot see great humor in it. All the same, here are some pregnancy quotes to cheer you up.

Dave Barry
You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

Nora Ephron
If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters.

Lawrence Housman
If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternately, there would never be more than three in a family.

Phyllis Diller
By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.

Cathy Crimmins
A period is just the beginning of a lifelong sentence.

Rita Rudner
Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

Irena Chalmers
There are three reasons for breast-feeding: the milk is always at the right temperature; it comes in attractive containers; and the cat can't get it.

Sam Levenson
Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.

Sherry Glaser
I realize why women die in childbirth - it's preferable.

Joyce Armor
Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.