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Family Guy Quotes

Really Funny Family Guy Quotes


If you are a fan of Family Guy you are surely looking for funny Family Guy quotes. So here is a dose of quotes that are a riot.
  • Chris Griffin: Where do you think you go when you die?
    Southern boy: I learned from church that if you're good you go to heaven but if you're bad, you go to a place where the dead believe they're still living and they pray for death but death won't come.
    Chris Griffin: UPN?

  • Oh, I must give you my e-mail address. It's loismustdie@yahoo.com.

  • Forecast for tomorrow; a few sprinkles of genius with a chance of doom!

  • Mother, life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get. Your life, on the other hand, is like this box of active grenades!

  • This is life. So go and have a ball. Because the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for you may not be right for some. You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have...my opening statement. Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.

  • Remember, nothing says 'good job' like a firm, open-palm slap on the behind.

  • Greg, I'm afraid you've earned four hours in the snake pit as punishment. And Jan, for tattling on your brother, you've earned a day in the chamber of fire.

  • Come, ice cream. Come to my mouth. How dare you disobey me!

  • I only drank so that the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off.

  • Oh, jeez, I spilled wine all over your shirt! You know what's good for getting stains out? Sex with another man.

  • Lois, when I'm through with them, our kids will be so smart, they'll be able to program their own VCRs without spilling piping hot gravy all over myself.

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