Quotes: Family Guy: Peter

Of all the Family Guy quotes, Family guy Peter is the one who deserves the trophy. He is full of nonsense, hypocrisy and gawkiness that make me laugh uncontrollably. You will love his style too. Read on.

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Peter: You know those Germans; if you don't join the party, they come get you.

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Teacher: In French, to say yes you say oui-oui.
[Peter starts laughing]
Peter: Oh, man, that's hysterical. (keeps laughing) Hey, what do you say for no, doo-doo? (laughs) Hey, I'll be right back. I've got to go take a wicked yes.

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Peter: Holy crip, he's a crapple.

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
[Riding a circus elephant]
Peter: Look Lois, the two symbols of the Republican Party: an elephant, and a fat white guy who is threatened by change.

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
[At a job interview]
Interviewer: So where do you see yourself in five years?
Peter: [Thinking to himself "Don't say doing you wife. Don't say doing your wife."] Doing your, uh, son...

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Peter: Hey Lois, give Chris a break. I mean, no TV? So he failed a class, it's not like he felt up his cousin in the garage that Thanksgiving when I was nineteen.

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Brian: It's really amazing how this has brought the whole neighborhood together.
Peter: You wanna know what's really amazing? I haven't brushed my teeth in 3 days, and no one has said a thing!

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Peter: Don't worry I got an idea. An idea so smart my head would explode if I even began to know what I was talking about...

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Mr. Weed: Peter, your fired!
Peter: Aw! Damn it... for how long?

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Peter: Well, fine. Until you put 'Gumbel 2 Gumbel' back on the air, I'm going on a hunger strike. Can you live with that? Huh, can you?
[brief pause]

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Peter: You gonna eat that stapler?
Network executive: Mr. Griffin, you can't eat a...
Peter: Wanna split it?

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Brian: Peter, did you read the fine print on this loan contract?
Peter: If by "read", you mean "imagine the naked lady", then yes.

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
[Peter saw Lois in a coffee shop talking with her old college boyfriend]
Peter: I saw you in that coffee shop, breaking the fifth commandment. Congress passes these things for a reason, Lois.

Quotes: Family Guy: Peter
Peter: Son, we're going to get you back in the Scouts so fast, they won't know what hit 'em.
[he backs into a parked car]
Peter: And, um, neither will that guy.

Also read other Family Guy Quotes:
• Introductory Page
• Evergreen Family Guy Quotes – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11
• Your Affable Stewie Griffin – 1, 2, 3, 4
• Funny ol' Peter Griffin – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
• Funny Conversations – Lois And Stewie, Lois and Peter - 1, Lois and Peter - 2, Lois and Peter - 3