Funny Bart Simpson Quotes

Quote lovers, who love to read funny quotes can enjoy a generous dose of funny Bart Simpson quotes. Bart Simpson, the little boy in the Simpsons household is full of wise cracks and crazy humor. You will love to read his views on life, relationships and even religion. Enjoy some wacky Bart Simpson quotes on this page.

Stupidity: Bart Simpson Quotes
Remember, you can always find East by staring directly at the sun.

Weird Humor: Bart Simpson Quotes
Cross you heart, hope to die. Stick a needle in your eye. Jam a dagger in your thigh. Eat a horse manure pie!

Life views: Bart Simpson Quotes
Good-bye, Japan! I'll miss you Kentucky Fried Chicken and your sparkling, whale-free seas.

Life views: Bart Simpson Quotes
There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the boogeyman or Michael Jackson.

Life views: Bart Simpson Quotes
What a day, eh Milhouse? The sun is out, birds are singing, bees are trying to have sex with them... as is my understanding.

Relationships: Bart Simpson Quotes
I can't stand to see you so upset, Lis, unless it's from a rubber spider down your dress. Hmm... that gives me an idea note for later: put rubber spider down Lisa's dress.

Religion: Bart Simpson Quotes
Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of this day, the birth of Santa?

Religion: Bart Simpson Quotes
Christmas is a time when people of all religions come together to worship Jesus Christ.

Spirituality: Bart Simpson Quotes
What if you're a really good person, but you get into a really, really bad fight and your leg gets gangrene and it has to be amputated? Will it be waiting for you in heaven?

Stupidity: Bart Simpson Quotes
Well in my family, grades aren't important. It's what you learn that counts.

Television: Bart Simpson Quotes
Dad, thanks to TV, I can't remember what happened eight minutes ago. No, really, it's a serious problem. Ha, ha, ha! What're we laughing about?

Weird Humor: Bart Simpson Quotes
Try not to move, Dad. You swallowed a lot of motor oil.