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Homer Simpson's Quotes

Quotes From the Wackiest Member of the Simpson's Family

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"The Simpsons" are quite a riot. Each family member portrays a different personality. On this page, you can read some of the funniest Homer Simpson quotes.

Food
All normal people love meat. If I went to a barbeque and there was no meat, I would say "Yo Goober! Where's the meat!?" I'm trying to impress people here, Lisa. You don't win friends with salad.

Life
In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.

Opinions
Being eaten by a crocodile is just like falling asleep in a blender.

Opinions
A boy without mischief is like a bowling ball without a liquid center.

Opinions
Well, you know boys a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have to read the manual and press the right button.

Parenting
Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. Heh heh heh! Right in the butt… that was great!

Parenting
Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.

Relationships
Come on Bart! Remember what Vince Lombardi said. "If you lose, you're out of the family."

Wise Cracks
Just remember; never be afraid to live your life on the edge... Now let's get home before your mother kills us.

Wise Cracks
Always remember that you're representing your country. I guess what I'm saying is, don't mess up France the way you messed up your room.

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