Marge Simpson Quotes

Marge Simpson is quite the antithesis of her husband, Homer. She has elegance, simplicity and strength of character. But when it comes to sarcasm, her veiled humor can be full of witty retorts. Read the wackiest things that Marge Simpson said and also what others said to her.

Wise Cracks
That's right. I'm a witch! And I'm the one who withered your livestock, soured your sheep's milk, and made your shirts itchy.

Food
Hey kids! I made your favorite cookies: Christmas trees for the girls and bloody spearheads for Bart.

Food
I brought you a tuna sandwich. They say it's brain food. I guess because there's so much dolphin in it, and you know how smart they are.

Insults
Homer, I've gone through seven years of receipts, and you've spent less on gifts for me than you have on temporary tattoos.

Insults
Marge, please. Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so that it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.

Opinions
Homer, you know how unpredictable the French are. One minute they're kissing a woman's hand, then next, they're chopping off her head!

Stupidity
I didn't choose to be a gifted actor, Marge. They chose me. I am just a vessel through which the genius flows.

Wise Cracks
You know, Fox turned into a hard-core sex channel so gradually, I didn't even notice.

Wise Cracks
Homer, don't take this personally, but I've obtained a court order to prevent you from planning this wedding.