I think any man in business would be foolish to fool around with his secretary. If it's somebody else's secretary, fine.
I was showing early symptoms of becoming a professional baseball man. I was lying to the press.
My computer goes down on me more often than my girlfriend.
Miguel de Unamuno
Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion.
All the things I really like are either immoral, illegal or fattening.
Nobody believes the official spokesman, but everybody trusts an unidentified source.
Don't forget Mother's Day or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day.
If we're not supposed to eat animals, how come they're made out of meat?
Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.
Some people are like Slinkies - not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.