Funny Dane Cook Quote

We have experienced many stand-up comedians. For every comedian who does well, there are hundreds who bite the dust before they manage to make it to the grand arena. But, Dane Cook is a one-of-a-kind comedian. He is bold, vicious, and exaggerated. His over-the-top comedy never fails to infuse laughter among the crowds. No wonder he has a loyal fan following. I have collected several funny Dane Cook quotes on this page for your enjoyment.

What did you say?... Careful? What are you... my lifeguard? CAREFUL!! What are you... spotting my jokes? CAREFUL... CAREFUL!!

I would still have old ladies come up to me after the show and pat me on the cheek after I had said all this vulgar stuff... They would be like, 'Oh you're a silly boy - we know you're just playing.'

One brother, five sisters… dude I’d have to wear a tampon just to fit in.

...I don't know if I could kill someone with a frozen turkey because that is a lot of evidence to eat. Unless I found a whole room of people who also wanted that person dead...

I didn’t want to call it Burger King so I called it the BK lounge.