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Really Funny Quotes

Non Stop Laughter with Really Funny Quotes

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There are funny quotes and then there are funny quotes. Some really make you guffaw, while others rarely make your lips curl in mirth. Truly, there are only a few award-winning really funny quotes that make you laugh over and over again. Here are a few really funny quotes that I think are quite different from the others.

Colonel Sanders
There's no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. You can't do any business from there.

Roseanne Barr
Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?

W.C. Fields
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

Milton Berle
They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.

George Gobal
If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

Groucho Marx
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

Voltaire
It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong.

Oscar Wilde
By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

Ellen DeGeneres
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.

Tommy Cooper
You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'

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