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Funny Life Quotes

Poke Around With These Funny Life Quotes

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Humor is the best companion to get through life. Sorrows are transformed into minor interruptions when you add laughter to your life. When life sucks, read these funny life quotes. If nothing else, they will help you regain your sense of humor. And if you find someone whining, share these funny life quotes with them.

  • Alan Bennett
    Life is rather like a tin of sardines - we're all of us looking for the key.

  • Carl Sandburg
    Life is like an onion: You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep.

  • Charles Schulz
    My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am I doing right?

  • Charlotte Bronte
    Life is so constructed that an event does not, cannot, will not, match the expectation.

  • Elbert Hubbard
    Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

  • Bob Monkhouse
    Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one?

  • Douglas Adams
    Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast.

  • Christopher Morley
    Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it.

  • Woody Allen
    Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.

  • Bill Gates
    It's possible; you can never know that the universe exists only for me. If so, it's sure going well for me, I must admit.

  • Henry David Thoreau
    The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.

  • Jack Handey
    I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

  • Friedrich Nietzsche
    He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.

  • Quentin Crisp
    You fall out of your mother's womb, you crawl across open country under fire, and drop into your grave.

  • Charles Schulz
    I think I've discovered the secret of life - you just hang around until you get used to it.

  • Jim Carrey
    I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer.

  • Richard Bach
    Here is the test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: if you're alive, it isn't.

  • Alice Roosevelt Longworth
    I have a simple philosophy: Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches.

  • Karen Horney
    The perfect normal person is rare in our civilization.

  • George Bernard Shaw
    Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.

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