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"Family Guy" Quotes

Famous "Family Guy" Quotes That Will Set You Roaring With Laughter

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Find the best of Family Guy quotes on this page. If you have watched Family Guy, the movie, you will thoroughly enjoy this set of famous Family Guy quotes.

  • Lois Griffin: Peter! You're bribing your daughter with a car?
    Peter Griffin: Ah, c'mon, Lois, isn't 'bribe' just another word for 'love'?

  • Brian Griffin: Ah, if my memory serves me, this is the physics department.
    Chris Griffin: That would explain all the gravity.

  • Peter Griffin: Brian, there's a message in my Alpha Bits. It says 'OOO'!
    Brian Griffin: Peter, those are Cheerios.

  • Meg Griffin: You could kill all the girls who are prettier than me.
    Death: Well that would just leave England.

  • Joe, I've had new neighbors before but none of them were half the man you are. And since you're half a man already, that splits them into some kind of fraction I can't even measure.

  • Do these huggies make my ass look big?

  • Chris, everything I say is a lie. Except that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that.

  • OH! mmm yes oh god this is better than SEX!

  • Tom, you're so deep in the closet you're finding Christmas presents.

  • Brian Griffin: Face it Peter, you get competitive about everything.
    Peter Griffin: I am so not competitive. In fact, I am the least non-competitive. So I win.

  • Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you, very homosexually.

  • Brothers and sisters fighting is as natural as a white mans dialogue in a Spike Lee movie.
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