"Family Guy" Quotes

Find the best of Family Guy quotes on this page. If you have watched Family Guy, the movie, you will thoroughly enjoy this set of famous Family Guy quotes.

• Lois Griffin: Peter! You're bribing your daughter with a car?
  Peter Griffin: Ah, c'mon, Lois, isn't 'bribe' just another word for 'love'?
  
  
• Brian Griffin: Ah, if my memory serves me, this is the physics department.
  Chris Griffin: That would explain all the gravity.
  
  
• Peter Griffin: Brian, there's a message in my Alpha Bits. It says 'OOO'!
  Brian Griffin: Peter, those are Cheerios.
  
  
• Meg Griffin: You could kill all the girls who are prettier than me.
  Death: Well that would just leave England.
  
  
• Joe, I've had new neighbors before but none of them were half the man you are. And since you're half a man already, that splits them into some kind of fraction I can't even measure.
  
  
• Do these huggies make my ass look big?
  
  
• Chris, everything I say is a lie. Except that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that.
  
  
• OH! mmm yes oh god this is better than SEX!
  
  
• Tom, you're so deep in the closet you're finding Christmas presents.
  
  
• Brian Griffin: Face it Peter, you get competitive about everything.
  Peter Griffin: I am so not competitive. In fact, I am the least non-competitive. So I win.
  
  
• Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you, very homosexually.
  
  
• Brothers and sisters fighting is as natural as a white mans dialogue in a Spike Lee movie.